Online dating is a numbers game. And with 5 million personal ads on Match.com alone, it's tough to make a mediocre one stand out.

That's where marketing comes in. Savvy singles are paying experts to jazz up their ads, from the portrait to the profile, to increase the odds of meeting someone.

" People should put even more effort into this than they would a job search," says Michael Lasky, co-author of "Online Dating for Dummies" (Wiley, Nov. 2003). "The consequences are so much greater. How many people take a job for life?"

Just like headhunters and rÈsumÈ -writers prepare candidates for interviews, digital dating pros will help you describe yourself to potential mates in the most attractive way. Profile doctors edit and shape your responses around tricky lifestyle and background questions while Internet dating coaches teach the do's and don'ts of cyber-romance. Professional photographers, meanwhile, make sure you look your best.

It's an investment - you can spend several hundred dollars on these services - but one that usually pays off. If your ad is appealing, you might land a face-to-face.

Profiles are where most singles need work. For example, not everyone understands what a woman means by "I don't play by the 'rules.'"

" Are you an anarchist, a Republican, perhaps a cannibal?" asks profile editor David Evans sarcastically.

Evans, the 34-year-old founder of ProfileDoctor (profiledoctor.com), a Boston-based service that finesses ads, says the biggest mistake is being generic. "People write things like 'I like movies,'" says Evans, a former management consulting research director who founded the company last summer after tweaking friends' narratives for beer money. "Well, what kind of movies? 'Dumb and Dumber' or subtitled French films?"

" Being bland is the worst thing that women do," continues Evans, noting that female clients usually want fewer, better matches. He advises them to avoid overused lines like, 'I'm just as comfortable in a little black dress as jeans and a T-shirt' and 'Family is an important part of my life.'

" If I don't like my mother, are you not going to date me?" asks Evans. "How is saying that going to filter the type of people that respond to your ad? It doesn't have a lot of weight to it."

For men looking for more responses, the first thing Evans suggests is removing sexual content, including "I'm the best lover you'll ever have" and references to porn. Also unappealing are vague statements such as, "I'm different from anybody else you'll ever meet."

" Is he a little person? Does he have four eyes? What does it mean?" asks Evans.

Evans charges $34.95 to look over - but not reword - essays. Within 72 hours of submission, users receive a detailed E-mail with hints and tips for correcting problems and enhancing other areas. They do the rewriting themselves.

" Our job is to make you stand out," says Evans. "We're like [cable reality show] 'What Not to Wear,' but much nicer."

E-date education

Before Melanie Dodson found her soulmate on Match.com, she scrolled through countless unimpressive essays and blurry pictures. "Every time I saw them, male or female, whether I was interested or not, my inclination was to help them," she said.

In January, the 30-year-old self-proclaimed poster girl for online dating founded Gratitude Productions (gratpro.com), a coaching service for those looking for love on the Web. For $250, clients receive four one-hour personal sessions or attend her one-day beginner or advanced Soulmate Surfing Seminar in Weehawken, N.J.

Dodson is a teacher and an editor, but mostly a cheerleader. She prepares clients, many of whom are in their late 30s and 40s, for the challenges of virtual courtships. "A lot of people want to try online dating, but they're apprehensive," said Dodson. "Others are just not good at advertising themselves."

With Dodson's guidance, both newcomers and veterans create positive profiles with clear self-descriptions and appropriate photos.

" Sometimes there's a disconnect between what they want and what they're advertising," said Dodson. "One woman had quit online dating because she was overwhelmed with responses, but none of them were quality. She wore a low-cut shirt in her picture and she was sending [the wrong] message."

Online daters also learn how to weed out the undesirables and "approach" potential mates via E-mail. "Mention something that caught your eye within the essay like, 'Oh, you like karate. I'm a brown belt working on my black belt,'" said Dodson.

Clarice Arvidson, a 32-year-old lawyer from Rockland County, dabbled with AOL personal ads about 18 months ago, but she couldn't bring herself to post a photo (which results in seven times as many responses, according to Match.com). She went to Dodson for help in January. "Melanie made me answer the real question: What are you afraid of? And she made me realize that my fears were conquerable," said Arvidson.

Arvidson was afraid of saying too much. "I wanted to keep my profile short, but Melanie said I wasn't giving people anything to work with," said Arvidson. "What you write shows your true colors."

With Dodson's help, Arvidson met her current boyfriend within a month on Match.com. "But I haven't told my parents. I don't think they'll ever understand," she said.

Although most of Dodson's clients are women, men are calling for help as well.

Martin Sage, a 52-year-old -executive coach from Manhattan, attended Dodson's seminar in May. Sage, who was married for 15 years, was intrigued by the possibilities of Internet dating, but worried about the "sleaze factor."

" I thought, oh God, my ex-wife is going to see this. But Melanie said, 'What do you care what people think?' She gave me the courage to try it."

Flattering photos

" Most adults do not have a good photo of themselves," says Mindy Stricke, a 30-year-old photographer who specializes in digital portraits for E-personals. "The last time they sat for a professional photo was their senior portrait in high school."

Stricke started SingleShots (singleshots.com) in June and since then has photographed women and men who have posted - or thought about using - blurry or faded snapshots for online ads. "One of my clients put a picture on JDate that was so washed out, she looked like she didn't have a nose," recalled Stricke.

For $125, clients get a photo shoot in Stricke's Manhattan home studio or a nearby park, and 20 to 30 digital proofs. Stricke resizes two images for the client's matchmaking service and does minor retouching to erase a stray hair or a blemish. But don't expect her to give you a digital nose job. "The best thing I can do for people is give them a photo that reflects who they are," said Stricke. "These are not glamour shots."

Entrepreneur Mel Russo, 35, was on Nerve.com for four months and was -getting messages from unattractive men. A friend hinted that it might be because of Russo's picture - a recent vacation shot that showed her squinting, half in shadow and with an arm draped around her shoulders (she cropped out her friend).

Stricke took her picture in May and Russo met her new boyfriend, Chris, two months later. "We were talking about what made us respond and one of the first things he said was that he loved my picture," said Russo. "If I end up with him, I will thank SingleShots at my wedding."

Upgrade your essay

We sent FirstTry23's personal ad to profile doctor David Evans. His verdict? Not specific enough and too ordinary. After studying his 4-page critique, the 25-year-old single real estate agent renamed herself GirlUptown and revised her essay. Which one would you respond to?

BEFORE

About Me
I hope you don't play by the "rules," because I don't either. I feel most comfortable in jeans and flip-flops, but enjoy having fun on occasions to get dressed up for. I love New York City and all it has to offer and am always looking to explore a new neighborhood, restaurant or park. I'm also a huge fan of live music and sporting events and am always looking for someone to go with. I do, however, appreciate the art of staying home and renting a movie. I have a 4-month-old puppy, so I am constantly out walking around with her.

Perfect Match
The person I'd like to meet is confident, but at the same time a bit humble. His family and friends must be a huge priority in his life. He enjoys quiet nights alone, but also enjoys a loud night out. It also wouldn't hurt if he's a Dave Matthews fan.

AFTER

About Me
" I carried a watermelon." Yes, I love cheesy '80s movies like "Dirty Dancing" and "Fast Times at Ridgemont High." I'd wear my flip-flops year-round if I could. I named my puppy after my favorite Starbucks drink ... let's see if you can guess. I'm also a huge fan of live music: Dave Matthews, Pearl Jam and Cold Play are some of the shows I'm seeing this summer. I never miss Duke basketball, I'm working on my short game in golf, and I often get last-minute Knicks tickets ... want to go?

Perfect Match
" Say Anything's" Lloyd Dobler meets "Top Gun's" Maverick. You're humble but confident, and a real guy's guy. You will take the initiative to plan out the first date and end it by walking me home. You're Craig Kilborn funny and can't wait to read the sports guy's Page 2 column.